I apologize for being without any updates for the entire month of November. I've been busy with NaNoWriMo, and am sooo close to winning! I didn't mean to leave you guys in the dark. I'll restart in December with some sexy, fresh posts!
Have an awesome Turkey Day! I know I will! I'm going to get soooo fat.
EDIT: Changed September to the correct month of November because I am a dunce.
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Sunday, October 26, 2014
Portal: The Dark Underbelly
Dear GLaDOS,
I know you tried to burn me in a pit of fire, and I maaaay have destroyed you by throwing your cores into fire instead, but you made me throw Companion Cube into a pit of fire first. I'm noticing you may have an obsession with fire. I think we can call it even. So how about some of that cake, huh? STOP HIDING IT!
Also, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEGS?!
Sincerely, Chell
P.S. No I will not assume the Party Escort Submission Position!
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I know you tried to burn me in a pit of fire, and I maaaay have destroyed you by throwing your cores into fire instead, but you made me throw Companion Cube into a pit of fire first. I'm noticing you may have an obsession with fire. I think we can call it even. So how about some of that cake, huh? STOP HIDING IT!
Also, WHAT HAPPENED TO MY LEGS?!
 |
| AND I CAN MOVE THINGS WITH MY MIND! But wait.. WHY NOT MY HANDS?! |
P.S. No I will not assume the Party Escort Submission Position!
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Monday, October 20, 2014
Bejeweled 3: Deceptively Awesome
Is Bejeweled 3 a simple mind-numbing game where you match up boring gems in a Tetris-style rip-off or a fantastical sci-fi magical futuristic adventure quest mission where you venture forth to save the entire freaking world?!
It's the second one! Minus that whole saving the world thing. I saved the world! Only I didn't.
It's the second one! Minus that whole saving the world thing. I saved the world! Only I didn't.
Saturday, October 4, 2014
Bioshock: A Beginning Impression
WARNING: THIS BLOG POST CONTAINS PHOTOS OF SIMULATED BLOOD AND GORE.
So I walked into a room. It's dark. It's dank. There's a mechanical whirring somewhere beyond, the unmistakable sound of a security camera as it moves one way and then the other. I take a few steps into the room, and I hear someone, but they aren't in front of me. There's a door beyond, and beyond that door I know, I know, there is someone there; there's also that stupid security camera. So I take more steps in, entering the door. I'm slow about it. I don't want to be ambushed. There's no one there. So I get a little relaxed, obviously there has to be someone further in the room. So far I'm not in any real danger. There is a wall of shelves and what looks like small hallway past it. that's where both of them have to be, that woman with her crazy voice and that security camera waiting to spot me, waiting to summon a droid to kill me. So I take more careful steps. I turn the corner of the shelf. The camera spots me with its classic triple ring, and then there's a voice that sounds like it is right behind me, almost like a whisper in my ear.
"You fell into my trap." I look around frantic but there's no one next to me.
Then there is maniacal screaming and I run, my heart beating fast. I scream, knowing she is right behind me. When I'm past the door, I turn. There's a woman with glowing, red-hot sickles at the ends of her forearms, just sticking out at the ends of her sleeves. I try to get more back, but I'm stuck. With shaking hands, I... take out my camera for a picture! Say cheese, crazy lady!
Welcome to Bioshock!
So I walked into a room. It's dark. It's dank. There's a mechanical whirring somewhere beyond, the unmistakable sound of a security camera as it moves one way and then the other. I take a few steps into the room, and I hear someone, but they aren't in front of me. There's a door beyond, and beyond that door I know, I know, there is someone there; there's also that stupid security camera. So I take more steps in, entering the door. I'm slow about it. I don't want to be ambushed. There's no one there. So I get a little relaxed, obviously there has to be someone further in the room. So far I'm not in any real danger. There is a wall of shelves and what looks like small hallway past it. that's where both of them have to be, that woman with her crazy voice and that security camera waiting to spot me, waiting to summon a droid to kill me. So I take more careful steps. I turn the corner of the shelf. The camera spots me with its classic triple ring, and then there's a voice that sounds like it is right behind me, almost like a whisper in my ear.
"You fell into my trap." I look around frantic but there's no one next to me.
Then there is maniacal screaming and I run, my heart beating fast. I scream, knowing she is right behind me. When I'm past the door, I turn. There's a woman with glowing, red-hot sickles at the ends of her forearms, just sticking out at the ends of her sleeves. I try to get more back, but I'm stuck. With shaking hands, I... take out my camera for a picture! Say cheese, crazy lady!
Welcome to Bioshock!
Sunday, September 14, 2014
Minecraft: That One Time I was Pushed into Lava by a Child
Let's begin the story at the... beginning. That makes sense, right? I had participated in a Silver Springs Survival Server Admin Event a couple of months ago. It was basically hide and seek, but we were given sticks that contained godly powah.
This stick made me enormously happy. Well, a few days later, some guy on server wanted to try fighting people to get their heads. You can essentially behead people and display them in your home. Not demented at aaall.
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Can you see the powah? Feel the powah. BE THE POWAH!
|
Saturday, September 13, 2014
Trine: Enchanted Edition - That Forest has a Whole Lotta Spikes
Look at it. LOOK AT IT!!!
Trine is a game that I purchased from Steam in one of my weakest moments, which have only gotten worse. I bought it as part of the Frozenbyte collection during the Steam Summer Sale. It has beautiful graphics, as seen in the screenshot above. That screenshot is only on medium. Despite the fact that my computer does funky things when its being pushed too hard, it played the game flawlessly. So at least it isn't too heavy on systems, or at the very least not on mine. The company who makes it is a pile of sweethearts because after they released Trine 2, they updated the original Trine with the Trine 2 engine. That's where "Enchanted Edition" comes from, as well as its prettifulness... ness. That's definitely an admirable quality in any studio or publisher, especially since they updated the original games to Enchanted Edition free of charge.
 |
| Why a forest would have such spikes is beyond me. |
Trine is a game that I purchased from Steam in one of my weakest moments, which have only gotten worse. I bought it as part of the Frozenbyte collection during the Steam Summer Sale. It has beautiful graphics, as seen in the screenshot above. That screenshot is only on medium. Despite the fact that my computer does funky things when its being pushed too hard, it played the game flawlessly. So at least it isn't too heavy on systems, or at the very least not on mine. The company who makes it is a pile of sweethearts because after they released Trine 2, they updated the original Trine with the Trine 2 engine. That's where "Enchanted Edition" comes from, as well as its prettifulness... ness. That's definitely an admirable quality in any studio or publisher, especially since they updated the original games to Enchanted Edition free of charge.
Monday, September 8, 2014
Wizard 101: How to Lose to Children in PvP
It's remarkably easy.
You step into the arena expecting it to be "fun" AND THEN YOU HAVE YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU!
I've never played in a PvP match before in Wizard101. I thought I might enjoy it, so I went to the PvP arena with my friend (you know, the same one that only appears in my Wizard101 entries). At first I thought of going it alone. I just logged on and thought, why not try PvP? Silly past me. You fool. Then I discovered there were teamed matches, so I went in with my friend. I didn't think it'd be a big deal with me being level 80, and my friend being level 88. I believe I thought it would be... "easy". HA! I'm waiting for our first battle, which took FOREVER for the queue to pop up, and my friend says it isn't a big deal. It's fun and stuff. That stuff would be pain and humiliation, for those of you who are wondering. I don't tend to like PvP because it can be uber competitive and people tend to get mean, but it's a kid's game and I've fought some really hard boss battles before, so why not? You fool.
You step into the arena expecting it to be "fun" AND THEN YOU HAVE YOUR ASS HANDED TO YOU!
I've never played in a PvP match before in Wizard101. I thought I might enjoy it, so I went to the PvP arena with my friend (you know, the same one that only appears in my Wizard101 entries). At first I thought of going it alone. I just logged on and thought, why not try PvP? Silly past me. You fool. Then I discovered there were teamed matches, so I went in with my friend. I didn't think it'd be a big deal with me being level 80, and my friend being level 88. I believe I thought it would be... "easy". HA! I'm waiting for our first battle, which took FOREVER for the queue to pop up, and my friend says it isn't a big deal. It's fun and stuff. That stuff would be pain and humiliation, for those of you who are wondering. I don't tend to like PvP because it can be uber competitive and people tend to get mean, but it's a kid's game and I've fought some really hard boss battles before, so why not? You fool.
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